As an adult in a new relationship, you often face a dilemma trying to decide if and when you might be ready to sleep with your new partner. Years ago, no dilemma existed. Society dictated that women remained chaste until marriage and encouraged men to be sexually experienced. A change in society’s view presents the sex question to both men and women.
Depending on your religious or moral views, addressing sex topics seldom occurred when you grew up. Developing your own comfort level is essential. Past experience tells you what feels right and what makes you uncomfortable. Here are some ways to decide if you are ready for sex with your partner.
1. Use the Past to Change the Future
- Consider past relationships and identify the timing of your first sexual in each one. Use that as a guideline to decide when the timing made you feel good or left you feeling guilty.
- Think about the commitment level you had in your past relationships. If you had a strong commitment level before having sex, decide if that worked for you.
- Consider past relationships that turned fleeting in nature. Determine how you felt having casual sex with a new partner.
2. Communicate with Your New Partner
- If you have doubts about sleeping with your new partner, talk to them about it.
- Sometimes, you believe your new relationship has a strong level of commitment. Do not assume anything. Talk with your new partner to know the level of commitment they feel.
- Once you communicate effectively with your new partner, you have the information you need to add to your inner gut feeling as to whether sleeping with your new partner is the right thing to do just yet.
3. Hold Off For A Few Weeks Or A Few Months
- New relationships often have almost a honeymoon phase to them. If you want to wait to have sex until you really get to know your new partner, hold off for a period of time.
- Some studies indicate it helps to wait until your feet are more on the ground and you really get to know someone. However, determine that time period with your new partner.
- Use caution when telling your new partner you love them after you have sex. Most experts found an increased level of pressure and guilt brought about the professions of love, rather than a true feeling of love.
4. Consider How You Want to Feel Afterwards
- If you want a casual sex buddy with no commitment expectations like escort Toronto, make sure your new partner knows that and there are no surprises after you have sex.
- If pregnancy and disease present concerns, discuss this with your partner. Decide what level of protection is right for you.
- A person who wants feelings of love after sex should wait until you reach that loved feeling before having sex with your new partner.
5. Trust Your Inner Voice
- If a new partner starts pushing you to do something you do not feel ready for, that should raise red flags for the relationship.
- Never succumb to pressure from your partner or other to have sex when you are not ready.
- Use caution when setting hard deadlines for yourself. Unrealistic expectations about a sexual relationship set in otherwise.
The best relationships base sex and other important milestones on communication. Mutual goals and expectations make all the difference when determining sexual timing. Do not be afraid to talk to your new partner about your expectations in a casual or serious relationship.